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Author Topic: professional hunter  (Read 3851 times)

Offline John Andrews

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Re: professional hunter
« Reply #10 on: July 24, 2009, 11:07:29 AM »
The PHs I have known have been pretty good folks, most of them. I have two PHs as neighbors, great folks. I have dealt with a some others that are slobs and a couple of more that are not popular with our locals and a lot of the public.

I used to get paid to eliminate groundhogs and other varmints on local farms. That's a far cry from being considered a PH, but I felt like one lugging that old Mauser around to the farms and blowing up critters when I was a kid. $.25 to 2.00 per critter seemed like big bucks back then. I think it cost me more for shoe leather than I profited. A minimum of a seven or eight mile hike to kill a couple was hard earned cash. Ammo cost $.25 per round for Norma 7.65mm soft point ammo, military ammo was just a few cents per round.

We have a pair of PHs close to home, a certain young fella and his drop dead gorgeous blonde wife that are on TV a lot. The have jillions of acres sewed up for their PH business, lands off limits to other than paying clients.  :tickedoff

A few years ago we had a couple of professional (?) hunters that are still sporting TV shows that showed up at the installation where I work. They bow hunted for weeks without killing a single deer.  :uglystupid2 They refused to follow our advice and worshipped the words of another employee. They had a big (I think CNN) motor home and the finest and latest gear on the planet. Morons with gear, we called them.
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Offline bohicajuan

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Re: professional hunter
« Reply #11 on: July 24, 2009, 03:16:30 PM »
I've seen a bunch of Stewart Granger and Victor Mature movies. Does that qualify me as professional hunter? :roll: :crazy2 :uglystupid2 :idiot2

All I need is the hat and safari jacket! :twisted: :roll: :wink:
To you gutless cowards and scumbags, who are trying to lie and rewrite history. To those out to commit genocide on the Southern people with your destruction of Confederate monuments and your attacks on Southern heritage and pride. Be happy for now. Because someday when that civil war you wanted starts. I will find you. And I will kill you.

Offline John Andrews

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Re: professional hunter
« Reply #12 on: July 24, 2009, 06:56:28 PM »
I've seen a bunch of Stewart Granger and Victor Mature movies. Does that qualify me as professional hunter? :roll: :crazy2 :uglystupid2 :idiot2

All I need is the hat and safari jacket! :twisted: :roll: :wink:
In some quarters, yes. Especially in bars and in doctor, dentist, and lawyer offices, and some politician's offices. ;D Barber shops for sure!
Oh, and on any hunting TV hunting show. You could be a high paid star, just ramble on about how to.  O0 Sideburns would be a must, and some hair growing under your nose. You would need a prop like a big cannon double rifle with a bore size that resembles a sewer pipe or a '57 Buick tailpipe.
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Offline bohicajuan

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Re: professional hunter
« Reply #13 on: July 24, 2009, 09:43:48 PM »
OK here's the deal....

We open with.....

Nekkid, buxom, oily, porn stars firing fully automatic weapons at pumpkins, water jugs and pictures of my ex-wife.....

Then we cut to deepest darkest Africa. Actually a vacant lot south of the Atlanta water sewage treatment plant.

JA, Big58, Tnutz, Morax, GP, KS and yours truly saunteer into view....

We each carry a double barrel .700 Nitro Express.

We all talk with British accents and claim to have hunted everything on the dark continent. We tell them we are out in search of the most elusive game ever known.......

The HONEST POLITICIAN!!!!

But before we can react, an entire battalion of PETA and Green Peace flammers show up. We have no choice but to defend ourselves with our big bore weapons.....

The Peatards try and shock us with their hairy legs and underarms and their cellulite encrusted thighs. Tnutz commits suicide but saves us by hurling himself into the folds of the biggest one there.....

We make a startigic withdrawl into a ravine before JA points out that this is how Custer bought the farm...

We then move rapidly away and lure the Green Peacers into a Sushi resturant where they are eatten by pi**ed off Japanese business men.

We finally make a stand with our backs to Stone Mountain Park standing in front of the great Generals Robert E. Lee, Stonewall Jackson and Confederate President Jefferson Davis cheering us on from the stone face above.

We beat back every atttack until we're almost out of ammo. At this point we hear a LOUD Rebel yell and Chuck Norris rappels down the side of the mountain and with one kick of his rattle snake skin boots destroys the fianl assault from the Petards and they are forced back to the unemployment lines and mental asylums they all were recruited from.

We all gather around Chuck who gives us the thumbs up sign and we....

Fade to black!!!!!

Now admit it. You'd pay GOOD MONEY to see that, wouldn't you? :wink: O0 :roll:

To you gutless cowards and scumbags, who are trying to lie and rewrite history. To those out to commit genocide on the Southern people with your destruction of Confederate monuments and your attacks on Southern heritage and pride. Be happy for now. Because someday when that civil war you wanted starts. I will find you. And I will kill you.

Offline Ks_Sniper

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Re: professional hunter
« Reply #14 on: July 24, 2009, 10:56:13 PM »
I especially like the part where TN is the only casualty. Thanks for savin our hind ends, TN. You da man. O0
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Offline Big58cal

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Re: professional hunter
« Reply #15 on: July 25, 2009, 07:52:34 AM »
I see Bohica got into John's stash.......... :roll:

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D



Yeah, I like it as well that TN was the only casualty. :twisted:
The only purpose of bread is to hold meat!

John Andrews Is My Hero!

In all seriousness, the Marlin is a great rifle, too. I own a Model 60, one of the best rifles ever made.
Brownings are nice, but in terms of quality AND accuarcy AND ruggedness, it's hard to beat the Marlin.
California sucks that's it.

Offline 2Nutz

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Re: professional hunter
« Reply #16 on: July 25, 2009, 08:14:11 AM »
Honor and country I say! But I am missen some meds too! ??? ??? :shock: I know he didnt!!! ;D ;D ;D And at the end the trophy wall comes up empty! :sad:
Still killen and grillen!!!

Offline John Andrews

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Re: professional hunter
« Reply #17 on: July 25, 2009, 09:27:47 AM »
Awesome! The theaters would be packed! And wild standing applause at the end of the movie!
Honor and country I say! But I am missen some meds too! ??? ??? :shock: I know he didnt!!! ;D ;D ;D And at the end the trophy wall comes up empty! :sad:
Nope! We would have heads of the enemy mounted on the walls and I would display my new collection of scalps. Chuck and the rest of us could make grand appearences and hand out autographed pictures. Tn would be there, too. After all, it was just a movie except for the fact the rest of the kills, except for Tn's, were real.  :twisted:
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Offline Big58cal

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Re: professional hunter
« Reply #18 on: July 25, 2009, 01:54:58 PM »
Tn would be there, too. After all, it was just a movie except for the fact the rest of the kills, except for Tn's, were real.  :twisted:

Dang it John! >:(  Why did you have to go and ruin it by saying that? :tickedoff
The only purpose of bread is to hold meat!

John Andrews Is My Hero!

In all seriousness, the Marlin is a great rifle, too. I own a Model 60, one of the best rifles ever made.
Brownings are nice, but in terms of quality AND accuarcy AND ruggedness, it's hard to beat the Marlin.
California sucks that's it.

Offline 2Nutz

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Re: professional hunter
« Reply #19 on: July 25, 2009, 06:43:48 PM »
Hey now I died here so you alls could keep eaten the stew! What the hay??? >:( ;D ;D ;D
Still killen and grillen!!!

 


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