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Author Topic: Wouldn't this be nice to hear?  (Read 1950 times)

Offline Ks_Sniper

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Wouldn't this be nice to hear?
« on: February 02, 2006, 01:12:28 PM »
My old man sent this to me. I read it and had to pass it on.


WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT,
DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?

My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of Iraq regime has been completed.
Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now to begin the reckoning.

Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are some of the countries listed there.

The other list contains everyone not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.

Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war.

The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell-holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.

Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France.

In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.

Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France, or maybe China. I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France, Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well. Bon chance, mes amis.

I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed  I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York. A special note to our neighbors.

Mexico is on List 2. President Fox and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra tank and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put em? Yep, border security. So start doing something with your oil.

Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now.

We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil in Alaska - which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there. They care.

It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, "darn tootin."

Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate homelessness in America. To the nations on List 1, a final thought.  Thanks guys. We owe you and we won't forget.

To the nations on List 2, a final thought: You might want to learn to speak Arabic. God bless America. Thank you and good night.

If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English, thank a soldier.

« Last Edit: February 04, 2006, 12:01:58 AM by Ks_Sniper »
When I was a child, I lived as a child. When I became a man, I put away my childish things and became a Gutpiler!

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Offline Hobbes

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Re: Wouldn't this be nice to hear?
« Reply #1 on: February 02, 2006, 01:51:04 PM »
Hell yeah. Dunno about the drilling of Alaska though. I guess if its all low profile and minor enviromental confict have at it.

Offline Jen

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Re: Wouldn't this be nice to hear?
« Reply #2 on: February 02, 2006, 10:31:50 PM »
I like that!!!  I'm gonna have to make a copy of it and hand it out to people!! O0

Jen :-P

Offline Ks_Sniper

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Re: Wouldn't this be nice to hear?
« Reply #3 on: February 02, 2006, 11:59:31 PM »
Just an afterthought, bearman, but no offense was intended towards our GPS canadians. Some of my best friends have been canadians. So, if offense was taken, I truely appologize. :-[
When I was a child, I lived as a child. When I became a man, I put away my childish things and became a Gutpiler!

Hunting Discussion Forum and Chat on Whitetail Deer Hunting - Anti Peta - Squirrel Hunting - Bow Hunting - Bear Hunting - Coon Hunting - Fishing - Firearms - Outdoor News - Cleaning Game -  17 hmr info and more at www.gutpilestyle.com ! http://www.camouflagenation.com http://www.thehuntingfiles.com  http://wildchildhuntingwear.com  http://www.isquirrelhunt.com http://www.iwhitetailhunt.com http://www.icoonhunt.com

Offline Mad River

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Re: Wouldn't this be nice to hear?
« Reply #4 on: February 03, 2006, 12:21:16 AM »
Like that will ever happen. :'(  Now if "Arnold" or Jesse Ventura were in office... ???

Now that Canadian thing...  Bearman's statements are true.  The dozen or so Canadian customers I have totally agreed with the U.S. decision and were quite unhappy about the Canadian Government's position.  Some of them even offered their apologies.  I have much respect for our Neighbors to the North. O0
I have long know that it is part of God's plan for me to spend a little time with each of the most stupid people on earth.

I see you're playing stupid again...  looks like you're winning too.

Offline eddiejohn4

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Re: Wouldn't this be nice to hear?
« Reply #5 on: February 03, 2006, 01:50:27 AM »
great read, semper fi

Offline Morax

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Re: Wouldn't this be nice to hear?
« Reply #6 on: February 03, 2006, 07:06:55 AM »
a lot of people equate canada and france to be hand in hand, but they are not, especially on the war going on... as fdar as the alaska drilling, we really dont need to do more since all we are doing is exporting the stuff out anyways.. we need to keep what is ours here. and what i mean by here is the north american continent. (not to poke at our frozen friends to the north  :-P )
when in doubt shoot twice

Offline John Andrews

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Re: Wouldn't this be nice to hear?
« Reply #7 on: February 03, 2006, 10:57:30 AM »
Good read! O0 :)
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Offline John Andrews

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Re: Wouldn't this be nice to hear?
« Reply #8 on: February 04, 2006, 09:55:34 AM »
Like that will ever happen. :'(  Now if "Arnold" or Jesse Ventura were in office... ???

Now that Canadian thing...  Bearman's statements are true.  The dozen or so Canadian customers I have totally agreed with the U.S. decision and were quite unhappy about the Canadian Government's position.  Some of them even offered their apologies.  I have much respect for our Neighbors to the North. O0
Me, too! I don't even know why we have a border up there, really.
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Offline Mad River

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Re: Wouldn't this be nice to hear?
« Reply #9 on: February 04, 2006, 10:02:26 AM »
Mad: what do you do for living, saying you have can. custumers?

Your are going to love this, my formal title is Senior Cost Estimator, Applications, and Sales Specialist.  I cut it down to Senior Estimator as to not sound like a corporate wind bag.  (Sounds really impressive; too bad I don't get paid on length of title.)  The company I work for is an Abrasion Resistant Ceramics Manufacturer.  Anyhow, we make ceramic tiles and cylinders that are engineered to fit various types of elbows, laterals, tees, cones, chutes, bins, hoppers, and things that see wear from conveying materials like sand, stone, grain, corn, peanuts, coal, salt, ores, silver, gold, etc.  Basically, the ceramic material we make will out last plain carbon steel by 5 to 50 times depending on velocities, impingement angles, etc.  I am in a very odd industry that very few people know exists.

In Canada, we deal with several of the major industrial supply houses, mine equipment suppliers, and plant engineering firms.  Most of the work we do up your way is for the mining industry, but we have also done work for power generation facilities and the steel industry.  Off the top of my head, we have done major projects in Newfoundland, Saulte Saint Marie, Ontario, Saskatchewan, and Sudbury.  If business ever slows down, we have been having record years for the last seven, I have quite a few hunting and fishing offers from guys up there I need to take advantage of.

On the subject of scotch, I am still a Johnnie Walker Black Label fan.


I have long know that it is part of God's plan for me to spend a little time with each of the most stupid people on earth.

I see you're playing stupid again...  looks like you're winning too.

 


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